Can't Fight This Feeling Any Longer
by MPPSexxySiriusJamesRemus
Summary: COMPLETE Song-fic with the song Can't Fight This Feelings Any Longer; by Chicago. Lily's battling her feelings for James; she's afraid... but yet not so much.


Can't Fight This Feelings Any Longer  
  
Summary: Song-fic with the song Can't Fight This Feelings Any Longer; by Chicago. Lily's battling her feelings for James; she's afraid... but yet not so much.  
  
Disclaimer: Own nothing.  
  
Can't Fight This Feelings Any Longer

* * *

** I can't fight this feeling any longer  
  
Yet, I'm still afraid to let it flow  
  
What started out as friendship has grown stronger  
  
I only wish I had the strength to let it show.**  
  
Lily stared awkwardly at James who was showing her around Hogsmeade.  
  
"Usually we go hang out by the Shrieking shack—"  
  
"Oh," Lily replied, running a hand through her hair.  
  
"Damn," he swore, looking at his watch. "I've got Quidditch. Sorry Lily—"  
  
"Can... can I come with you?" she asked hesitantly.  
  
He stared back at her smiling. Her cheeks flushed with blush and she followed him to the Quidditch pitch. Over the course of their seventh year friendship, she found herself smiling more often; blushing at the oddest things; thinking about him continuously. And as much as she hates to admit it, she was never a big risk taker. She thinks she'll lose his friendship if she tells him the truth. She thinks that he'll decide that he's over her, and leave her for the next challenge.  
  
'Cause that's all she thought he wanted her for. The challenge. The thought that he would work to conquer her. But the hours she spent with him moved onto days. What she thought would be a hang out every once and a while became an "I'll meet with you at the Three Broomsticks." She didn't understand it completely; but she was more scared that she fell for him.  
  
**I tell myself that I can't hold out forever.  
  
I say there is no reason for my fear.  
  
'Cause I feel so secure when we're together.  
  
You give my life direction, you make everything so clear.  
**  
He ran into the Quidditch changing room as she climbed up the bleachers. Her whole view on James had changed for the better. They now shared their small smiles; not glares or duels. She doesn't know what changed her whole view; maybe he grew up... or maybe something inside of her changed. Maybe she stopped caring. After watching them practice for a while she started walking around the bleachers thinking about what had previously happened.  
  
_"Hey, Lil."  
  
"Hi, James," she had said. "What's up?"  
  
"Well... this weekend I was wondering if you'd like to—"  
  
"Sure!" she said quickly.  
  
"Umm... so we can meet here?"  
  
"Sure," she said, trying to control herself.  
  
"Great... I've been having some problems with Charms—"  
  
"Charms?" she repeated.  
  
James nodded before smiling at her. "Thanks... I'll see you later."  
  
"Um... bye."  
_  
**Even as I wander, I'm keeping you in sight.  
  
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night.  
  
And I'm getting closer than I ever though I might.  
**  
She was so embarrassed that she had actually thought he was asking her out. He hadn't done that for a long time; which is why the thought that he was over her ran through her mind more than once. She wondered why she had been so keen to tell him yes; well, she didn't wonder, she knew. Mildly over the past three weeks or so, she had been falling for him. It all started on Christmas.  
  
_"Hey, Lily! Happy Christmas!"  
  
"Hey, guys!" she replied cheerfully, looking around at Sirius and James; Peter and Remus decided to go home for Christmas. James sat down next to her and Sirius on the other side. "What's going on?"  
  
"Nothing," James replied. "Just celebrating our last Christmas at Hogwarts, with our favourite redhead!"  
  
"And who's that?" she asked flirtatiously, trying to ignore the look Sirius and James shared.  
  
"Snow ball fight!" declared Sirius, pulling us out of the Great Hall and down to the grounds.  
  
After twenty minutes of trying to decide which was the best way to attack each other they declared every person for themselves. Sirius seemed to take this as a 'Lily and Sirius vs. James!' He threw a ball at James to which he dodged but tripped and fell. Lily laughed throwing a ball at Sirius.  
  
"I thought you were on my team!" he said indignantly.  
  
"Ahhh! Noooo!" she laughed running away from Sirius.  
  
"I will save you," said James heroically.  
  
Lily laughed hiding behind him. Once again he tripped over his shoe lace. This time he fell back on her and she looked up at him as their faces grew closer. She felt his breath on her cheek when she quickly panicked.  
  
"You should tie your shoes," she replied quietly.  
  
James grinned, "I suppose you're right."  
  
As he leaned down to kiss her Lily got a face full of snow, as did James, but he got hit on the back of the head. Sirius ran away yelling like a maniac and James followed him, furious. Lily giggled to herself, following the best friends up to the castle.  
_  
**And I can't fight this feeling anymore.  
  
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.  
  
It's time to bring this ship into the shore.  
  
And throw away the oars forever.  
**  
She walked on the bleachers again and noticed James flying around yelling instructions. She smiled to herself looking up at him. He flew past her, momentarily stopping to yell something. Their eyes locked but he said nothing to her; he ordered Stebbins to pass him the Quaffle.  
  
She laughed, 'Here he goes... showing off for me again,' she thought but she smiled at his thoughtfulness.  
  
After he scored a few goals he went back to going over a play. The teammates, depending on their position went to see James at different times. He was the first ever person to make Quidditch captain in their fourth year at school.  
  
Then the thought struck her: He's showing off for her. That can only mean he still has feelings for her, right? She laughed at herself, 'Well you didn't think he was gay, did you?' Of course not, she decided. It was quite funny how she looked up at him with a longing look and yet he didn't act upon it.  
  
Again, she was at lost of whether she should be glad that he isn't acting or not. She wasn't sure she was ready for the kind of relationship she was willing to have with James Potter. It seemed as though part of herself matured faster than the other part. She understood that if she dated James, she would date him like she had never dated a guy before. With thought, meaning, and love.  
  
**'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore.  
  
I've forgotten what I started fightin' for.  
  
And if I have to crawl upon the floor.  
  
Come crashing through the door.  
  
Baby I can't fight this feeling anymore.  
**  
He flew down to meet her on the bleachers.  
  
"Hey," he called, walking towards her, with his broom over his shoulder. She smiled his way, crossing her hands over her chest. It was now of all times that she found him most irresistible. After he had come from Quidditch and he was exhausted. He was so cute she can't help but want to turn around and kiss him. But she'd rather explain things before actions. They always seemed easier and more genuine.  
  
"Can I talk to you after practice?"  
  
"I've got a moment now, if you want to go for it."  
  
She sighed. "I can try."  
  
"Okay, shoot."  
  
He sat down expectantly on the bleachers.  
  
** My life has been such a whirl wind since I saw you.  
  
I've been running around in circles in my mind.  
  
And it always seems that I'm following you.  
  
'Cause you take me to the places that I thought I'd never find.  
  
Even as I wander, I'm keeping you in sight.  
  
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter's night.  
  
And I'm getting closer than I ever though I might.  
**  
She stared at onto the field. It seemed so much easier in the movies. If this were a story she could just turn around and say, 'I love you!' and he'd grin. They'd fly away on his broomstick. He wouldn't question. He wouldn't wonder why she had waited so long to tell him. Because if this was a story he would know. If this was a movie, then this is how the script would have been written. But life was the way it was for a reason. Life would be less beautiful if she didn't have to explain her feelings.  
  
"You all right?" he asked concernedly.  
  
She smiled back at him. "You changed me you know."  
  
"Excuse me?" he asked politely, standing up. Perhaps he was thinking that she didn't want to be his friend any longer. Whatever be the chase he was listening intently.  
  
"Who would have thought that I'd be your friend let alone..."  
  
She trailed off and he wondered what she was talking about. She wondered if it was that easy. Whether it was or not, it was the right thing to do. James had a right to know.  
  
"Let alone what?" he asked, moving closer to her.  
  
She sighed. "Let alone falling for you..."  
  
**And I can't fight this feeling anymore.  
  
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.  
  
It's time to bring this ship into the shore.  
  
And through away the oars forever.  
**  
"F-falling for m-me?" he gasped out, his hands going limp by his side.  
  
"James I... I like you."  
  
"You're not lying—I mean... this can't be real—this has to be a joke."  
  
She sighed. "I know it sounds unrealistic because you know... feelings don't change that quickly."  
  
"I didn't expect them to change at all," he said truthfully.  
  
She smiled up at him as he continued to mumble out things. "James..."  
  
"I mean... who would have thought that you'd fall for me? In a million years nobody would have seen that becoming. And I can't say I wouldn't agree. I was such—"  
  
"James!"  
  
He looked up. "Huh?"  
  
She smiled, knowing that there wasn't really anything to worry about. Because she knew that she can't help what had happened to her.  
  
"Are you going to sit there and ramble... or are you going to kiss me?"  
  
He looked as though he had been waiting to hear those words for his entire life. Well, as long as he knew her, he's been wanting to hear those words. Silently, he walked up to her and titled her chin up. They stared at each other and he leaned down to kiss her; Quidditch practice forgotten. She felt her stomach flip as she lightly kissed back. Never had she been so emotionally and physically attracted to a guy before.  
  
When the kiss broke off they stared at each other for a moment, before kissing each other again. This time it was actually deepened. And as they stood there, everything in the world seemed to go right. Their history was planned in those two minutes they sat there lightly kissing. They were destine to fall in love; have a child that was strengthen by love. They were destine to live the rest of their life together; to fight for the cause they think is right.  
  
As for what happened to our favourite couple?... That's history.  
  
**'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore.  
  
I've forgotten what I started fightin' for.  
  
And if I have to crawl upon the floor.  
  
Come crashing through your door.  
  
Baby I can't fight this feeling anymore.**


End file.
